“The fishermen know that the sea is dangerous and the storm terrible, but they have never found these dangers sufficient reason for remaining ashore.” ~ Vincent Van Gogh

Isn’t that the same with parenthood?  We brave the inevitable chaos, definite stress and throw caution to the wind when it comes to parenting.  When most of us find ourselves in the parenting situation, we’re very much resigned to see it through.

The many storms in family life swell and dissipate one by one.  Sometimes they come continuously and finally ebb.  We weather them all.

Now that the holidays are upon us the pressure to spend money that most of us don’t have mounts unholy stress on the parents and offspring as well!!!  Social and economic peer pressure are part of the great nonsense that we let ruin our feelings of peace and well-being.  Why do you allow this to happen?

Let’s not forget the individual storms our offspring go through.  Have you considered that their problems feel like storms to them?  The deep lessons in relief you teach them (about this money issue, for example) serves their health and happiness for the rest of their lives.

Have you mastered the lessons yourself?  How do you relieve yourself of peer pressure?  Let’s talk about that a little further down in this post.  Let’s protect ourselves where we can!!!

“Medical errors are a top cause of death.”  According to a Johns Hopkins Research team, “250,000 deaths in the United States are caused by medical error each year. This makes medical error the third-leading cause of deaths in the country.” ~ Readers’ Digest.com

Doesn’t it make sense to do our part to avoid the need for medical assistance to the best of our ability?  Peer pressure, money pressure and the like stir up emotional storms that lead to disease (dis ease).  These storms of pressure are part of the chaos in our very sensitive family life/system.

“Chaos theory is a part of mathematics. It looks at certain systems that are very sensitive. A very small change may make the system behave completely differently. Very small changes in the starting position of a chaotic system make a big difference after a while.” ~ Edward Lorenz, ‘The Butterfly Effect’, (Wikipedia)

Do you know chaos can be a good thing?  When you’re ‘centered’, you’re able to appreciate and engage the ‘excitement’, aka chaos, that’s unfolding for the growth benefit of your offspring (and yourself).

If you’re the parent of an adult the chaos may simply be the noise occupying your mind, the residual of what you perceive as your parenting mistakes and/or your desire to have a friendship with your offspring who don’t want the same.

To what extent do you consider the sensitive nature of your family system?  It can be mind-boggling to even consider the many ways confusion can start with even just two people in the equation/family.  Best to just deal with it.  Examine it in depth later.

How do you relieve yourself of the pressures and unnerving consequences of caving to peer pressure, money pressure, etc.?  Here are a few initial steps.  (Like the ‘stop, drop and roll’ recommendation when you’re on fire):

1. Stop in your tracks and breathe.  Breathe in calm, exhale noise.

2. Drop your attachment to outcomes.  Assess what, if anything, is really needed to be done; in this moment, later or at all.

3. Roll with the situation.  Flow in listening.  We have two ears and one mouth for a reason.  [If danger is involved in the moment, remedy the danger first then roll…]

A preemptive strike for eliminating or significantly lessening problems in the future is to deep dive into your meditation practice and get in touch with that part of you that doesn’t need the approval of others, that part of you that yields forth the overflow of abundance, that part of you that attracts harmony, cooperation and peace.  Are you in touch with this You?  Yes?  Teach the children.

What if you could glide along the edges of chaos and dissolve the energy of it from a calm vantage point?  Can you see how this would calm the emotional seas of your family life?  Our health and happiness is found there.

If you need help with this, let me help you gain that calm vantage point.  Many parents come to accept chaos as normal… and it is, but you need not let it stress you and negatively affect your health, happiness and longevity!!!

“No one would have crossed the ocean if he could have gotten off the ship in the storm.” ~ Charles Kettering

You can get off the parenting ship but do you really want to?